REMEMBERING...MEMORIAL..

These upcoming Holidays are so bittersweet for me. I have "no real family" per se, my son,boyfriend and I usually surround ourselves with friends during these times. Basically anyone who doesn't have a place to go on Thanksgiving and Christmas. My table has been full with laughter,good food, and love. This year is different as was last year. I lost a very very dear friend of mine due to Domestic Violence, Unfortunately Her husband was never convicted of the said crime because It was more on the "Verbal and Emotional Abuse" level. She was an epileptic but the stress of everything going on in their "life" pushed her over the edge. "They" said she had a seizure and never woke up. This was a week before Christmas. No matter how many times you talk to women or show them that the "grass is greener" on the other side sometimes they are just so far gone that nothing you say or do will help. Specially if they are not ready to listen. In my mind her abuser/husband will always be at fault for her early demise, she was only 35 years old and left behind 3 beautiful children. Who now have a wonderful, healthy, happy life. She was there for me in the "height" of my abusive situation and we bonded over our parellel lives. It breaks my heart that I had to bury such a young woman, a good friend. In the last several months before her death, her husband didn't like the fact that I knew more than I should about his life and I was "filling her head"with all this nonsense. He had alot of very dark secrets that he kept from the outside world and I believe on some level from her. He put a wedge between my friend and the kids because we were getting "too close" and he didn't like it. On the same token, unfortunately she allowed it because he had her so brainwashed that he "was perfect" and everyone in the outside world was out to get "them." I kept close tabs on her and the kids because I worried about her constantly, with every right too. On the day of her funeral, her husband actually tried to keep the kids away from me but her oldest who I had known since he was a baby and my son grew up with wouldn't leave my side. Every chance he got when his father wasn't around he would be glued to us. He knew that we knew the truth because he could always be himself when he would come over to hang out. He was a really good kid but his parents never gave him the benefit of the doubt or tools to shine. I recently saw pictures of the kids since they are now living with there Aunt they are loved,clean,healthy and happy for the first time in their lives, with no contact with their father. Their isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss her, when she passed a piece of my heart left too. I see her smile,her eyes and her rebellion in those kids and it makes my heart proud that her spirit still lives on...in the children...I miss you and love you my dear friend MARCIA...R.I.P. 12-17-2009.